By: Angela Gillaspie © 2005

Gettin' hitched? Congratulations!

Uniting two families is a big deal and there are many traditions, superstitions, and rites that must be followed no matter if you're a Catholic, protestant, or vegetarian. For example, deciding when to have the ceremony is important for future happiness. Pick the wrong month, day or time, and you and your future spouse might be cursed and end up on the Jerry Springer show. Also, picking what color to wear and choosing the luckiest pair of shoes is important too.

First you need to choose the right month and here's an old but catchy rhyme to help:

Married when the year is new, he'll be loving, kind and true.
When February birds do mate, you wed nor dread your fate.
If you wed when March winds blow, joy and sorrow both you'll know.
Marry in April when you can, joy for maiden and for man.
Marry in the month of May, and you'll surely rue the day.
Marry when June roses grow, over land and sea you'll go.
Those who in July do wed, must labor for their daily bread.
Whoever wed in August be, many a change is sure to see.
Marry in September's shrine, your living will be rich and fine.
If in October you do marry, love will come but riches tarry.
If you wed in bleak November, only joys will come, remember.
When December snows fall fast, marry and true love will last.

Apparently, the best months are January, April, September, November, and December, and the worst are May and July. If you like to travel (you know, back and forth to all those NASCAR races), then June is for you, and if you're a democrat and like change, then August is the month for you and your betrothed. In February and March, you'll break even, and in October you'll have love, but it'll be a while before you get that raise at work.

Now that you've chosen the month, you'd better pick a good day. According to this folk rhyme, Wednesday is best:

Monday for health, Tuesday for wealth, Wednesday best of all, Thursday for losses, Friday for crosses, and Saturday for no luck at all.

Hmm, with all the weddings on Saturdays nowadays, maybe this is why the divorce rate is so high.

What time of day should you get hitched? According to folklore, the wedding should be completed between the half hour and the hour so that the clock hand will be rising toward the top of the hour. The rising clock hand suggests rising fortune and success.

Okay, now that you've chosen the date and time for your wedding, your next move is to figure out how to get the items needed for a brand new house and home. The politically correct bride doesn't come into the marriage empty handed; she started planning for her wedding as soon as she was old enough to ask Daddy to make her a Hope Chest. Traditionally, she puts something fancy called a "trousseau" inside her chest. A trousseau is basically the stuff a bride collects for her upcoming marriage, like clothing, linens, a Crock Pot and die cast NASCAR miniatures. She often dreamt of her husband-to-be while sewing linens, knitting underwear, and sculpting his 'n hers heart-shaped teacups out of clay before gently placing them in her Hope Chest.

The groom, on the other hand, doesn't have a fancy term for what he brings to the marriage, but the engagement ring is probably the most expensive thing (and most important - according to the bride) he buys. Many moons ago, the engagement ring started out as being the groom's partial payment for the bride - as a symbol of the his promise to marry. You know, in my day, the father of the bride's shotgun worked as well as any engagement ring, but Daddy wasn't as pretty to show off, though.

Another way for the newlyweds to get stuff was to have a bridal shower. They say that showers originated from a Dutch maiden who fell in love with a poor miller. Her friends "showered" her with so many gifts that she could do without the missing dowry.

Historically, the bride and groom weren't the only ones receiving stuff because it was common practice for the betrothed families to exchange property. The groom's family coughed up things like money, pigs, or land to give the bride's family to compensate for the loss of their daughter, and the bride's family gave a dowry made of money, earthenware trinkets, or potatoes to the newlyweds for their new home.

Great! You've picked a date and you're on your way to getting stuff, now ... what do you wear? There are many rules and superstitions about what to wear and how to wear it.